Chill Pill

I am away in paradise at the moment and am very glad for it. While all of you are minding my business anf trying to cause me unnecessary hassle, scandal, and a racing heartbeat because I simply don't know what the hell happen or what the hell is going on. But at this moment I am tucked away in a villa on a hill, over looking a flowing stream and a valley filled with ashen trunked trees and smelling of frangipani.

Frankly, thanks for all the publicity. As for the criticism, what do I care. My confidence and self-satisfaction does not depend on anyone's opinion or judgement of me. Why should it, when all the people that criticize me are dumbasses anyway. Whoever you are, you are too narrowminded, thoughtless and irrational for me to believe your assestments of the person that is me should have any creditability atall for me to give a shit about what you think.

As I was walking through all the art gallaries and sculpture workshops in Bali today, it suddenly dawned upon me that South East Asian culture, or for that matter, the cultures of most southern countries have always seen nudity and polygama as a very natural thing. Think about it; the tribes in the Amazon, those of the Maori, the Iban in Borneo. Look at the art dating back to as recent as before the second world war. Are the women mostly naked, or at least topless in them? Does no the alpha male take several wives or lovers? And the amazing thing is that it is NOT degrading for women in those cultures then, simply because women were revered as goddesses, and their body sacred vessels. Look at the way they depict the female body in their art! There is nothing degrading about that. They are mostly naked, and they are mostly beautiful.
I don't have much time, so/but go read The DaVinci code or Eve's Seed.

It was only much more recent where the mindsets and morality for th more so called 'developed' cultures came in and imposed their own silly moral standards upon these people. (A Balinese boy referred to women covering their breasts as 'modern dress'). And then now it is us that are going back to these places as tourist and taking off our tops on the beach and selling them our movies about 'decadent' living. WHEN ALL ALONG, THEY HAVE ALREADY BEEN LIKE THAT. And then there are some of us for these so called developed countries that tell their students that Western Influence is 'morally corrupting'. Clearly we just like to cause unnecessary for ourselves. Because some of the idiots out there have nothing better to do then come up woth all these moral standards so that they can hassle other people with it.

(If you are studying human geography and tourism in a singaporean school, you now know how dumb your teachers are when they say that the western world has brought decadent values to these places. Like topless sunbathing. Please Laugh.)

I have been modelling in the nude for a long time now, and that is all the modelling I am ever interested in doing. I simply do not see the virtue in hiding my body. It is a beautiful piece of creation (and so is yours, if you take care of it. All God's creation is beautiful) and it is a medium through which I can use to express myself and the person that is me. But it is also something that makes me what I am. Whether we like it anot, we are influenced by how we look and what we do with our bodies. The physical is inxtricably liked with the mental and the cerebral.

When I look at the photo that has caused so much unnecessary (but all the same welcoming) publicity. I do not see a nipple. Because that is what I think has caused much of the sudden attention. Previously I have posted pictures in the nude, only I had covered all the ultra-sexy bits. This time, I didn't. And BINGO.

It was not my writing, not the fact I try send out the message to everyone out there reading me the message of 'hey, just BE yourself'. Not that some people actually find solace in reading what I write (and believe me it take a whole lot of effort and though), or that they feel inspired, or that they are just plain entertained.

It is not the fact that my photogrphs are beautiful, that these photographers are really talented people and that I put in a hell lot of effort into keeping in shape, looking good and always being creative to make something people will enjoy.

It is not the fact that light and shadow, the colours black and white can provide endless possibilities for the creation of something aesthetically pleasing.Or that there is something of virtue to be found in a girl living in the day and age of physical insecurity to actually love the way she looks.

That photograph is of me taking a moment to appreciate myself, and telling everyone else that they should do that too. (To both appreciate themselves, and me of course :P )

But the newspaper articles.. what were they about?

They were about a nipple.

Give me a fucking break. Who has not seen nipple? Who in Singapore has not sucked a nipple in their life?

I KNOW nipples. To the jerk that insulted my parents, my mother sure raised me well, buster. From the time she suckled me, she sure as hell did.

Singapore will NEVER becoming artiscally vibrant unless we really lighten up. Why is it allright to see naked picutures on the blogs of girls from the US, some of which are assuredly more highly eroticized then mine, but scandalous to have it come from a Singaporean girl? The last time I checked, we have all the same bits.

I will write more when I get back, but here are some thoughts for all of you in the mean time.

Kisses to the people that have been reading me regularly, and have sent me all those emails of encouragement. And to Gabriel Seah, who's COMPLETE statement to The Straits Times (that deceitful paper) is this, "'The Internet is a free society, there is no reason why anyone should not do this, because it doesn't hurt anyone. *A lot of things that used to be considered bad are now acceptable, so maybe we shouldn't be so quick to judge and condemn.*

xoxox