Rainy afternoon, date with Martine that got fucked up because too-many-people-look. Young girl, older white guy kinda problem, what a pain in the ass. He’s so gorgeous I cannot possibly see why it should be a problem in the least. So what if he’s old-er, if you really want to be shallow, at least he falls into the category of the tres chic and very desirable.
I hate being in public with him, or with Chris, or with any decent guy I like for that matter, because I’m still bothered (note, not concerned. Bothered. ) with what other people think. With M it’s not so bad, because he is good-looking, and I feel proud when I walk about with him. Like I got a good catch, ya know? But with the other blokes…; It’s just like wearing a pair of super-comfy shoes that are slightly worn out and don’t really go with your outfit. People look at them and stare at you weird, and that bothers you a little, but you’re happy nonetheless. Your happy with yourself, just a little tiff-ed that their opinions should matter.
Anyway, I suggested a number of things rather off-handedly to M today. First off, I hope he breaks up with Liz before I leave the country, then I wish greatly that I can spend some time in Europe with him, alone, in the summer, and then I hope he will leave Singapore soon and go back to the States because at this point in time, it seems like that would be the most sensible course of schooling decision for me.
Speaking of which I need to run off right now to do a TON of work! God-damned.
xoxox
No comments:
Post a Comment