Monday, December 27, 2004

End of Story

No, nothing tragic has happened during the past few days, aside from the fact that I think I’ve caught a mild case of mumps, and my dear little sister is down with a fever. It had been raining pretty much incessantly after Christmas day, and it was a un-welcomed 21 degrees. I’ve normally no problems with 21 degree weather, but this one was very wet, windy, and something I didn’t expect. I’d brought clothing for the sort of weather you’d normally expect along the equator, even though by this time I honestly should have known better.

Martine called me up from HCMC yesterday where he’s apparently presently vacationing with Liz at the moment to ask if everything was allright. I can’t remember exactly what he said, but he begged a little caution out of me with regards to the situation with you-know-which-relative. If I told you how I’d behaved around him (like what I’d told Martine) you’d say I’d deserved it. But I’d been behaving like so around him for as long as my memory can go back, and since I’ve not been alive for too long, it goes back till the year I became capable of memory, and thus, rational thought.

So when I got up, I was in my underwear and he’d seen me in it. No one in my whole extended family cares if your walking about in your underwear at bed time, or just after dawn. Everyone walks about in their underwear from the shower to the bedroom, that’s normal. I don’t know how it’s done in other places outside laid-back, under-developed ASEAN nations, but up till now, there are places where whole families still shower out-doors, walk around barely dressed most of the time, and so be it. A cousin of mine goes back to that old place of his occasionally where the house is actually several individual rooms built separate on a small compound, with something like an outdoor kitchen to which the shower is adjoined.

And may be I should not have gone on that walk with him if I didn’t wish to encourage any illicit behaviour, but while on one hand he couldn’t have forced me to go to the park with him, I could not have refused, and didn’t think it was right. We’d always had a pretty decent relationship, and I’ve spend more time with him over the course of my life then with any other of the adults. He was the only one that didn’t annoy me with pointless questions about what I’d wish to do with my life, where I’d been the whole day, the method to which I applied to my Ginger Snaps. Of for God’s sake. So I really didn’t want to refuse him my company, it would just have made things worse I think.

That morning itself, he’d made an attempt already, which I rejected quite sarcastically (‘Watch it, you don’t want to go too far’). If I’d said no to his offer at taking me to the park thereafter, it would have come across as ‘I know you’re going to try something funny, so no’. The possibility that he might didn’t elude me, but I believed he probably offered without any intention to do so (I normally go jogging, so anything illicit would not have been possible then). I didn’t want to ruin years of goodwill because of a silly little weakness, and if I’d said no, I’m sure it would have stung and caused unnecessary embarrassment. I am being too kind, I know. A lot of other people think that if something like that happened to them, they’d have told him to go to hell. And sent him to it too.

I doubt they will though, if it really happened. Most people are normally not crazed, and I am really unfazed by it; I’ve been assaulted a fair number of times in my life, most of which during my adolescent years, and I certainly could have reported their stupidity to my parents or the police, but why ruin their life. And besides, it was never a big deal to me. If I got raped, may be I’d make that an issue, but otherwise, while yes I’d been violated, nothing has been demanded or taken from me that I didn’t want to give. It normally stops as, ‘Watch it, idiot, or I’ll cry so loud you’ll be sorry’. Most of the time, they were sorry. The pathetic fools.

I’ll never comprehend what manner of stupidity inflicted those people I used to spend my pre-teen years with. They were well over the age where they became responsible for their own actions, and what took in them to attempt anything with a 12 year old is something I’ll never know. They are just stupid, that is all.

Tori’s best buddy (cum errand runner cum computer technician, no puns intended) had one of her friend lean on his shoulder once and attempt to cozy up with him. Smart boy, he nudged her gently away. At least he has sense.

All that aside, this season has been rather mediocre and I cannot wait to go on holiday with Ethan soon. Have I mentioned this before? He still insists on taking me out late January, and I’ve persuaded him to watch a Manson concert with me in Bangkok. Am very excited about it now, have been wanting to see Manson in concert since I was in Secondary School. I know I will not be disappointed, Manson’s exciting to watch even on DVD.

Plus, I’m going to redecorate my room once again. I’ve finally hit upon a convenient, aesthetically pleasing way in which I can store the excess of pillows and bolsters. Rattan baskets hanging from the ceiling. And I’m going to purchase new sheets and nail up a couple of paintings that are about to be finished.

I’ve also got a mild case of mumps I think, at any rate, the left side of my neck’s swollen. I’ve only one Christmas present this year, and I just got it in the mail. It’s the Suicidegirls Calendar, and it’s gorgeous, much better (not to mention far more tasteful) then the one that came in with last years FHM. Illustrations of tattooed, naked women that you recognize? So much fun. Goes with the new paintings in progress too, and the new illustration on my chalkboard.

Oh, and I’m thinking of going to a liberal arts college, to study illustration, along with hopefully some 3D animation and well, whatever else it is that teach in liberal arts colleges. As long as it isn’t in Singapore, all suggestions will be welcomed.

xoxox

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