Thursday, June 16, 2005

Good Morning

Good Morning to all of you moralistic pricks who thrive on scandal. (I am sure I’m not the only one that sees the irony in that greeting). I am about to get a heart-attack from too much excitement, but as always, better some action then none.

Let me define my purpose in life once more, those that have been reading for a long time already know what it is, but I shall do it again. I am not looking for 15 minutes of fame and am not looking for scandal. When I started Sarong Party Girl, I did it mostly as a joke. A joke at the other SPGs out there who didn’t want to admit it to themselves, and also a joke that was directed at myself. Because I thought I was weird, chasing white guys. For awhile, it was a rather amusing activity, because they didn’t really seem like people at first. Simply because I was 17 when I started, and I had nearly zilch exposure to white men.

It’s just like the first time your all girl’s school holds a dance with the neighboring boy’s school. Boys weren’t unique individuals so much as they were Boys. Strange, Novel, Exciting, you get the idea.

But more importantly, I did it (initially) as a project to help myself, and the other people that somehow vaguely identify themselves with me to come to terms with this awkward reality. Hey girl, see, this is what YOU want and there’s nothing embarrassing about it. You just want something that much of the rest of society has either never thought about, is for too shy on insecure (colonial mentality or perhaps just plain being unused to getting placed in a dating situation they have never been in before) to realize what they want, or simply are not interested.

SPG-ism is a prevalent social phenomena, and there’s no reason whatsoever for us to deny it, or to only accept it from the pen of an errant cartoonist and the crude imagination of a pot-bellied white guy. I got simply got sick and tired of people making fun of girls that dated white men. We are all People who are trying to find ourselves in life, and no one has the right to make fun of anyone else. Unless they make fun of you first of course.

But I digress. My purpose in life is to create things that people will enjoy and can identify with. It’s as simple as that. Writing, Painting… the whole process of Creating is my passion. But on top of that I am also naturally a public person, more simply put, an exhibitionist. There’s nothing negative in that term. All actresses, rock-stars, presidents, celebrity economist are exhibitionist. They like to be recognized. And being recognized is important to me, but I don’t and never wanted to be recognized as the Singaporean girl that put her naked tit on the web. What’s so fantastic about that? For heaven’s sake, I love stripping, but I’m better at a whole lot of other things that actually take a significant amount of time to develop into something constructive. I would like to be recognized for those things.

Unfortunately, all that the local papers can gripe about all damn day is how I put a naked boob on the web. One more naked boob among, say a gazillion other naked boobs. Along with all the slutty housewife boobs, to artificially enlarged boobs, to Lolita titties to oh… Cow udders.

Frankly, I have no complains. If you want to give me publicity, I’ll take it. My mail box is exploding, and I love it. Interviews? Bring them on. Do you have a glossy men’s magazine? Oh darling, publish an article by me and I will give you a photoset. You know why? Because I know it will get me where I want to go. And if it doesn’t, what do I care. I still have other talents I can use to survive.

But there is one thing though that PISSES ME OFF. It is this. Don’t ANYONE dare include anyone else in my life into this mess you have made. I operate alone. Whether I want to or not, I will always be involved in the sex business for the larger part of my life one way or the other. But it is not what my parents have chosen for me, neither is it something I would like to include my siblings in, if they would rather not be included.

The SHITHEADS that have insulted my parents, listen up. Have you seen another girl’s breasts aside from your wife’s? Have you seen a Tiger show along the streets of Pat pong or Pattaya? Have you had fantasies of anyone other then your wife (i.e. you imagined ANOTHER woman naked and imagined coming over the face and her tits and slapping her cheeks with you filthy cock) You probably have. If you say no, you are now not only a moral bigot, but also a bloody liar and a serial sinner.

Good news, God will forgive you.

Bad news, you will be miserable in your own denial.

But really, it’s none of my business.

My mother knows about it all of course, and she was a lot more accepting of it then I thought she would be. She’s a smart, contempory woman, thank God. Of course she doesn’t agree with it, but hey, I’m 19, and I’m not only old enough to know what I’m doing with my life, but I’m also brutally honest with myself and know what’s a sensible course of action and what isn’t.

The whole time in Bali, I was worried about one thing, and it was this: What would my parents think? Now that I know whatever happens, they’ll still be there for me, I’m not the least bit troubled. Of course I worry for their privacy, and the privacy of the life I have that is not part of this sudden pointless hoo-ha, and I will appreciate it if no one attempts to cross that boundary.

You see, if people actually bothered to read what I am about, then there is nothing to be ashamed of. I’m really just a girl that doesn’t see any damn big deal in nudity, thought it was nice, and posted it. When I posted THAT picture, all I expected was a few, ‘ooh, sexy’ emails. Oh well.

I am very tired, very confused, and very frazzled. I wish people would be more considerate, but that’s just not the way people are. Most people are unfortunately fucked up like that.

I was hanging out with some friends some time back, and one of them suddenly just threw his hands up in the air after receiving an sms message and went, ‘why is it SO difficult to get people to work hard!’

There you have it. People don’t like to work hard, but like to bother everyone else about nothing of any significance whatsoever.

And one last thing. The people that think I put the photograph for attention: When the Straits Times wanted to publish that first article, I said I would really rather not. But they said it was going to press, whether I liked it or not. So stop bloody thinking I crafted all of this.

Xoxox

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hiyee,

I recently read about you in The Staits Times and gota know about your blog...

I believe you must be a real nice honest person... truthful to yourself and others...

And the best part that i like about you is your ability to stay the way you are, despite negative comments made by others... well, you reali do not have to care about wat others feel about you.. as long as you know where you stands and have the support of your loved ones...

Stay it your way... cheers!!

From,
Charles
hotshox81@yahoo.com

Anonymous said...

where's the nude photo's gone? I wanna see some of that tasty chinee poon tang they's got going on in singapore

Anonymous said...

you should check out black men, some have real big cocks I hear

Anonymous said...

Fuck 'em. I may not agree with the things you've said, but I have always respected the frankness with which you've said them. In this prudish country, you're publicly honest and unpretentious about your sexuality, which is a rare thing.

You've conducted yourself incredibly well. You have nothing but my respect, sympathy, and my middle finger so you can give the press another one while you're at it. Keep on trucking.