To be honest I didn't think I'd fall in love. What was this crazy little thing anyway? I've felt adolescent obsession, animal passion, tender friendship, but never like this. To have let myself trust someone so fast and so much was out of character for me, and to have had it reciprocated was even more surprising. Before I knew it, I was spiraling down the rabbit hole and making promises to myself I couldn't keep.
It came sneaking up on me as we had fun and shared similar states of mind. It didn't pin me down like an obsession, arresting me with an uncontrollable need to have always the object that is desired. I knew I wasn't chasing after a fantasy. I knew why I liked him, I knew his impossible situation, and I feel level headed about it all. I don't think I am making up an ideal of a person in my head that doesn't exist in reality. Which is the best thing about it. All there was was the right person, the right place and the right time. There are no dreams, this will be what it will be. Something that may become clearer to me with time.
1 comment:
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