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I Just Died

This is really weird.

I have all these drafts that I never posted, and as I was going though one of them, I found this really queer one that made no sense whatsoever.

Go figure! Because I can't/

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Dear Diary,

I just died. I don’t know how, but I did. One moment I was drinking a glass of really good merlot, and the next thing I knew, I was well, dead. I have no idea what the kids will say when they find me like this the next weekend they come to visit. I’ve tried dragging the body into the garden, but to no avail. Dead people aren’t all that good at burying themselves, really.

Everything on earth looks strangely kitschy and badly colored, the sort of tones you get in an indy art-house film that’s trying too hard. The merlot’s a strange sort of red, but it doesn’t matter. I can’t seem to drink it anyway.

Right now, I don’t quite know what to do, so I’m just standing around on the patio making up the first entry in the diary of a truly reborn soul.

I have a body that can’t die now. Isn’t that amazing?

I’m attempting flight at the moment, ghosts always could fly in the cartoons I watched as a kid. And those cartoons didn’t lie. Dead people CAN fly. But it’s not how I thought It’d be though. It’s not like flying with wings, or floating about like David Copperfield. That’s so boring. Flying, when you’re really, truly dead is akin to being omniscient. I don’t quite know how to describe it, but I can be in so many places at once, know so many things, see the whole picture and see into everyone’s little detailed lives.

I can lift myself a little, just up to the top of my roof, and the little street I spent the last few years in spreads out till… well, till the end of the street. I can project myself up, all the way into the cosmos, and the cyclones and all the oceans, and the Great Wall of China and most of Shanghai, sticking out of the earth, her buildings in all their magnificent dislocation; they all spread out before me.

And I can see someone’s panties. They’re black, with polka dots and little fake diamonds on them.

Zoom in, zoom out.

xoxox